Every single day, it appears like we are residing in an increasingly liquid world. I’m not preaching against the evils of alcohol or for a new era of prohibition that will save us from sin and politicians. Immediately after all, water is also a liquid, and it rarely inflicts us with either sin or politicians.

But we do anticipate every little thing to be excruciatingly straightforward these days, so liquid is the operating technique of selection.

No time to eat? Grab a liquid breakfast and run. Why tie a knot in the umbilical chord connecting your bed to your desk? If you can uncover a lengthy adequate straw, just commence slurping as you rise from bed, and smack your lips to the last drop as you whiz out the front door. Bye.

Bear in mind when soap came in bars? Strong bars? Sorry, I guess I am showing my age. Now everyone utilizes liquid soap. Yesterday I reached for the soap. No, wait. I reached for the hand cream. Or was it the soap? But what if it is the hand cream? Soap or hand cream? Which is which?

Men and women employed to nail siding onto the exterior of their houses. Now they just spray on ”liquid siding”. It comes in 3 tasty flavors: siding, ceramic and stucco. Yum.

And now they’ve taken my small vitamin supplement tablets and liquefied them, as well.

”Hold on just a minute. How do you know they liquefied the vitamin pills?”

Who mentioned that?

”Are vitamins naturally solid? Or are they naturally liquid?”

Uh. I had to admit that I almost certainly would not recognize a vitamin if I bumped into it in the street … in which case I have a hunch it may be too massive to swallow. Say, who is this?

”Exactly where do you believe vitamins come from, anyway?”

I constantly assumed they came from the back of the corner shop in a little town in Indiana, but upon reflection, I suspect they may well come from oranges and fish and milk. Who are you?

”Don’t you assume it is fairly challenging to stuff a fish into a difficult, small pill?”

I suppose The Voice has a point.

”You drink milk, do not you?”

Yeah, but that’s simply because it really is liquid. Suddenly I recalled my dream from just final week. Cow following cow heading into a factory on a conveyor belt. At initial I even though it was the Annual Bovine Loved ones Reunion, but on the other side of the factory, riding the same conveyor belt, have been neatly sealed cartons of milk. Aaargh!

”Squeezed. Like an orange. You drink juice, never you?”

Yeah…but squeezing a cow?

”Just what do you know about liquid?”

I thought genuine challenging. Everything comes in one particular of three states: gas, liquid and strong. Gas is like the politicians when they are speaking. Liquid is like the politicians when they are difficult at function attending cocktail receptions. Strong is like statues of politicians.

Every little thing comes in either gas, liquid or solid. That is about all I could keep in mind of my high school chemistry. That, and how to explode a partially dissected frog. No, wait. That wasn’t chemistry class. Silly me. Why would we have a partially dissected frog in chemistry class. That was that other class. What was it named, once more? Oh yes, ”property economics”.

”Did the frog contain vitamins?”

Not any more.

”Do you think it really is easier to pack vitamins into a tiny, hard pill or into a drink?”

I suppose it all depends on what kind of explosive you use. I attempted to picture squeezing a fish into a carton. But fish walking up a conveyor belt seemed just a bit radical … and even much less tasty than freshly squeezed cow. In addition to, I might need to acquire fishing gear to get my milk…er…fish juice from the carton. this month

”Liquid vitamin supplements are produced only from plant components.”

That is it. Keep your cow. Keep your fish. Hold your frog…what is left of it. I am going to for a pure liquid life.

My only query now is: Which one is the soap, and which one is the hand cream? And which 1 is my liquid vitamin supplement? I don’t want to drink the soap by mistake.